Archive | September 2016

Bringing Natural Hair to the Stage

It is quite common that when it comes time to slay whether it be at the club or at prom, wearing your natural hair is not what comes to mind.  Sure, you may get a curly weave or something that looks natural but it is still not your natural hair.  Even when it’s time to go back to school, women love getting a fresh install to feel good for class.  But why is that?

There is still a lack within our community to put natural hair as the top beauty ideal.  Unless the hair is long with “perfect” spirals, natural hair is hardly worn when it is time to look our best.  Our hair is constantly straightened, braided, and put away.  I would like to take a moment to recognize some women who proudly wore their natural hair in times where beauty is the highlight of an event:

Cierra Jackson – Miss DC in Miss America 2017

Image result for maria borges natural hair

Maria Borges – First model to wear natural hair in Victoria’s Secret Fashion Show


Yours truly, Stelly in my high school pageant in 2011

The “stage” in this sense is referring to any sort of spotlight.  Are you a manager?  A mom?  On the executive board for an org?  An employee in corporate America?  A wife?  When you are in these roles, you are constantly being watched by others and the way you wear your hair has more of an influence than you think.


It is important for women to continue to spread the notion that natural hair is beautiful when it is time to be beautiful.  Each time you think you look your best with hair that isn’t yours, just think that you are spreading that message to someone else.  Someone who may not feel as confident in their hair will see you changing yours and fall into the idea of changing theirs.  Or imagine if you were to have a daughter and she’s always watching you hide your hair.  Little girls or even women who aspire to be like you when you wear a business suit, in leadership positions, or even in a relationship will look at your hair and think “well maybe if I change my hair too, I can be like her.”

With that being said, what you do with your hair is a choice.  However, it becomes a problem when we have a headline for a black woman wearing her natural hair at a pageant or a black woman being the FIRST to wear their natural hair at a VS fashion show.  Just think about your choices for a second.

Side Note:  In the case of the Victoria’s Secret model, she asked if she can wear her natural hair.  Otherwise, they would’ve put a wig or weave on her.  With Miss DC, her stylists were against it but she pushed anyway.  Even if you are in a situation where your look isn’t completely in your control – ask anyway!  Be defiant.  


Why I Quit YouTube

Yes – I made YouTube videos in the past.  I was your typical YouTube hair girl showing you how I do my wash and go, talking about my hair journey, and giving tips and advice about hair.  Sounds like normal stuff, right?  Exactly!  I was a duplicate of everyone else.  I brought nothing new to the table and that’s how I feel about the YouTube market now.

Even outside of hair, I feel like YouTube is getting more and more uploads from people simply trying to become “successful”.  If YouTube couldn’t show you views, subscribers, likes, or comments, over HALF of these people would not be on YouTube.  People are now seeing YouTube as a lazy way to make money and gain fame and not as an outlet to just simply upload videos they’re passionate about.  Of course there are those who just genuinely like making videos but I feel like these new users are just doing it for easy money.

Now before you guys scream at me and say that YouTube is not easy – I beg to differ.  If all I had to do was glam myself up everyday and just talk about stuff I do anyways on camera, I wouldn’t feel like I’m doing anything.  Don’t forget, I used to sit there and edit videos too – I’ve been there!  From my experience, making videos is much easier than doing homework, going to class, or working at a corporate office 5 days a week.  I will actually compare it to my blog posts: you think of stuff, you marinate on it, and boom – make it happen.

No one has a unique identity on YouTube anymore.  No one is different now.  There are only so many twist-out videos, product demos, wash and gos, baby hair and puff tutorials, night time routines, try on hauls,makeup tutorials, vlog channels, beauty channels, and 100 coats of ___ videos to watch before they all start looking the same.  It is hard to keep up with all of them!

So basically to help answer questions and give advice, I find that it is much easier for me to write a blog.  I am in no way trying to gain fame or money from these blog posts.  These are strictly informational as I still get a lot of questions about my hair journey.  I will not be making videos except for little snippets on my Instagram and Snapchat.